I realized recently, that on my other blog, (the one that stays within a small loop of writers and allows me to gripe a lot), I’ve been getting a bit grim. I suppose I’ve got to the point in my writing career where I realized that it’s just me against the odds. I have a bad feeling that anyone reading my posts over there must be thinking getting published isn’t quite the joyful, liberating experience they thought it might be.
Well it is. (honestly!)
But-I find I have a tendency to grit my teeth and get all ‘driven’ when I get a partial or a full manuscript rejected or a contest entry trashed. I’ve been there so many times-but I’ve finally realized that it’s just not worth agonizing over these things. Now I just write.. In the last year as well as getting published by Ellora’s Cave, I’ve finalled and won some RWA contests, had three fulls rejected and at least ten partials.
You have to make a choice. Give up or keep going. That’s a decision only the individual writer can make. After the dejection of rejection, you have to make up your mind. How much do you want it? How much is it worth to you? Of course, it’s probably easier for me to make these lofty statements now that I’ve had some validation.(g) But I want more. I want to have lots of books published in different sub-genres.
I think it’s my Irish fatalistic streak showing, mixed with some English grit. All I can do is write. I love to write, It’s as important to me as breathing. The rest is out of my hands.
Have I depressed everyone on this blog now?
Let me end on a happy note.
I’ve survived a whole day with 4 kids on my own while Mr Kate heads off to China!
No grim blogger did I see.
You’ve found what works for you and that’s grand.
And surviving 4 kids while Mr. Kate is off to China, that’s amazing. 😉
-k.
No, of course you didn’t depress everyone, Kate. At least not your fellow writers, because we understand! 😉 No matter how many years we’ve been writing and submitting manuscripts and then gnashing our teeth while waiting impatiently for the verdict, rejection hurts. Period. It’s definitely a temporary downer. Yes, we all know that we’re not supposed to take it personally, but let’s face it, there’s that little part of us that simply can’t help it. We’re just human. It’s devastating when, after we’ve slaved over a manuscript for God knows how long, perfecting it beyond measure so that it can’t help but dazzle anyone who reads it, we get a rejection. The form letter ones are worst of all. (Lord, they didn’t even give me or my manuscript enough credence to afford a personal line or two!) Sigh.
Negative reviews are no picnic either. You can have nothing but glorious 5-star reviews and then that one crappy one. And, by nature, that’s the one we tend to focus on. It’s all a part of the quirky career we’ve chosen. A writer’s life is riddled with so many ups and downs that it sometimes feels like our emotions are riding a never-ending roller coaster. If we creative people are to survive and thrive, we must find ways to keep our fragile egos in balance and feed ourselves with plenty of positives and lots of laughter–and distance ourselves from doomsayers and negative people because they’re poison.
Since I write romantic comedy, I know from the get-go that not every one is going to get it. What’s funny to one isn’t necessarily humorous to another. What has one reader laughing out loud will have another scratching her head in wonder. But I understand this. I really do. And so I do my best to remember this when a reviewer writes one of those scratching head kind of reviews…after I shed a tear or two. LOL
There’s a distinct bright and shining upside to all of this, Kate. We writers are blessed with those magnificently jubilant periods when it seems that everyone LOVES something we’ve written and all is well with the world. The editor eagerly snatches it up for publication, readers send us glowing fan mail, chat lists are rife with “you-simply-MUST-read-this” type of chatter about our book, and reviewers sing our praises to high heaven. It’s a monumental high that, at least for me, outshines all the down times of being a writer.
And about giving up? Hah! Forget about it, Kate. We’re writers, and that means it’s our nature to write. We can’t NOT write. Whether we do it for publication or pen words meant for our eyes only, for our own personal satisfaction, write we must. Of all the careers I can imagine (and Lord knows I’ve had a lot of them), I can’t think of anything as ultimately fulfilling as living my dream of being a writer.
Your blog post is a good, insightful one, Kate. As writers we lead necessarily solitary lives and reaching out to other writers via our blogs when we need to talk to someone who can really relate is great therapy. Almost as satisfying as a pound of chocolate. 😉
And I’m REALLY sorry for writing a whole damn book for a comment! Eek!
Mr Kate here!
Just to prove I do read ur blog, even from Beijing China!
See u soon
Mr Kate X
Dear Kake…You are an awesome individual…nothing grim about you dear.
(btw, I love that Mr. Kake reads your blog! Mr. Mel doesn’t…unless he’s the topic) LOL
Well done!
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Well done!
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