The first thing on my mind for this blog is pets. Having a family of 4, we’ve had a few. There was the ferocious iguana who attacked anyone who tried to open his habitat, the snake which had to be fed live mice (shriek!)the hermit crabs-I personally liked them a lot as they didn’t get out much and the big drama of choosing a new shell? Better than any reality show. BTW-I noticed in Petco recently that they now sell ‘bling’ for your hermit crab-no kidding.

So son number 2 is having a birthday and he wants 2 goldfish-he has already named them Rocky and Ringo. Fish are okay, I suppose, although I suspect these will not have a long and happy life due to No. 2 son’s desire to poke and prod and fiddle with everything until it breaks. We shall see how it goes.

I have a cat, he’s the only pet who has managed to survive our family for several years mainly because he treats us with total contempt, probably has at least three other families feeding him and weighs twenty pounds. Nothing gets to him much and I like that in a pet.

We did have a dog once but true to our good choosing skills he turned out to be completely neurotic. It’s obviously catching. I’d just like to mention at this point in case Mr Kate is reading this blog, that I didn’t want a dog and I was right wasn’t I?

Now I want a dog. Having 3 teenage sons I’ve realized that I want to return to a time of uncritical adoration and unconditional love. Mr Kate insists I get that from him already but I know his attentions are shared between me, his daughter, his mother and his horse.Oh I forgot his car. I”m not quite sure where I come on this list and I’m afraid to ask.

My boys and I recently sat Mr K down and asked him about what he wanted in a dog. He decided it needed to a) have no hair b) not bark or whimper c) not drool d) not smell and e) be small.
We concluded that he’d be better off with a skinless chicken breast.

I want a King Charles spaniel-I look a bit like one apparently, so growing to look like my dog would be easy. And I quite fancy the idea of my photo in the back of one of my mega selling books clasping said spaniel to my face. Can’t you just picture it?

While you get over that horrific image, let me change the subject and talk about my upcoming short story in “Sex and Shopping” Changing Rooms. I got my advance copy of the book today and it was a thrill to finally see a real print book with my name in it. And yes, of course I licked the cover! Last time I looked, Amazon UK had the book at 3.99 so rush out and pre order your copy now! (there’s a direct link on my website) That’s for the Brits who read this blog. It comes out in the US at the end of December so you all know what you are getting for Christmas now don’t you?

It also made me wonder, oh blog readers,what’s the worst pet you’ve ever had?